Which Way's Up

Another one of my favorite articles as I take a moment to glance both backward and forward. This year? Definitely a “Look Both Ways” moment as 2024 felt an awful lot like a never-ending game of Frogger. There were many times, in 2024, when I felt like I was about to cross the street safely and then, bam!, a bus would appear out of thin air. That is exactly why I love to take an annual moment to look back thoughtfully. As I do, all those busses disappear enabling me to recognize the many unicorn-drawn carriages that also ambled my way.

If you’d like to review my 2024 goals before reading on…click–> Sing When You Win. If you’d like to skip this whole passage, feel mostly free but I encourage you to at least read my final thoughts at the end to learn about the Premortem which, frankly, we all should be taking part in each year.

2024 | Looking Backward

What was on my docket for 2024? Oh, believe me–I’d also like to know. I am a little nervous to kick this off as I may have forgotten to visit this punch list immediately upon making it. Honestly, that may be an accomplishment in itself. Paying little attention to goals or resolutions has never been my Type-A/OCD style, but I have to say…I kind of enjoyed it!

Learn to Embroider: Nope. I did not learn to embroider. This has been an ongoing challenge since 2022 when Santa put an embroidery machine under the tree. Evidently, I pissed Santa off that year and his revenge rolled right into 2024. I did make a few (very few) stabs at it with moderate success but just days ago I decided to pack up hoops, backing, and other shit. I’ll open that back in a different era.
Writing A: I did keep freelancing in 2024 and I did write a few articles about travel. Those travel articles only met the public through Which Way’s Up or my agency (Any Adventure Vacations). It has helped me a little, in knowing “how” I want my travel voice to land which is pretty much the same as my regular voice…informational with a touch of humor. I did not dig into actual travel freelancing for any magazines but there’s always this year.
Writing B: Big success here as I did publish the audio version of What to Expect When You Weren’t Expecting in March. This was a HUGE accomplishment as it was quite the project. I learned a TON about the audio side of book writing and publishing. I also learned a TON about the level of patience my husband truly has for my “I can do this myself” projects. I had planned to take six months off from all things books after finishing this project and I almost made it…
Socials: I did clean up my socials a bit in 2024 and am basically an influencer now but only if 200-ish followers count. It’s really hard to have two “self-employed” careers that each require self-pimping when one doesn’t really want to be socially saavy. I did keep a steady pimping cadence in 2024 but didn’t love the crossing of the writer and travel streams. May tweak again in 2025.
Wear the jewelry: I wore the jewelry. I am incredibly luck to be married to a saint who also likes to buy me shiny things but I have been terrible at giving each piece a regular turn…until 2024. Good for me. I will be adding more baubles to my collection in 2025, starting with a ~~huge reward~~ ten-year anniversary band.
Rot: I learned this term on our Ask a Gen Z podcast and did spend ample-ish time rotting in 2024. Did I reach the level of a Gen Z in which I could spend a full day tucked under the covers while watching Tik Tok? No, not at all. Did I do better than in previous years? I think yes.
Career Casual: I did not go back to the corporate world. I did, however, check LinkedIn on occasion. Does that count?
Letting go of the riff-raff: I think the riff-raff got took up less space in my 2024 head but, sadly, the riff-raff continued to plague me. I did learn a great (and accurate) personality term in 2024 (thanks ,Elise Meyers): OCD People Pleaser. If someone doesn’t like me, I just know it’s all my fault. Could be a total stranger that I’ll never, ever cross paths with again—I will obsess over why they didn’t like me for ~~hours~~ years. Turns out, sometimes it’s not me. Turns out, sometimes, it’s not me that’s the problem–it’s actually those around me. I guess the riff-raff is just going to be a work in progress for life.
Clean out the toaster oven: I still have the same toaster oven. I cleaned it out regularly. It is a thing of wonder. I may try this with my coffee maker.
Sing When You Win: I don’t mean to brag but…I did find some unashamed confidence in 2024. Where? In my new(ish) role as a travel planner. Why? Because I dug deep into learning the industry, growing my client base, and seeing the rewards. Pre-2024-me would have whispered all of that but, sales demands a louder voice (ie…word of mouth is real). That confidence to sing has started to seep into other areas of my life and I am learning NOT to whisper. Women are raised to whisper. We do not need to whisper. We need to sing when we win.

2025 | Looking Forward

Learn to Sew: Yes, I see the irony. Put away the embroidery machine and pull out the sewing machine. In the pile of stuff that came from my mom’s sewing room, I found an unfinished, quilted table runner. Unfinished and also un-started – just a pattern and fabric. It’s already too advanced for me but, someday, I will make it. The thing is, I was feeling so incapable at embroidering that I was avoiding my arts & craft area altogether lest I catch sight of that stupid machine collecting dust. As soon as I voted to not embroider, I felt enough relief to start some sewing baby steps.
Travel Agenting: I’m actually not fond of that moniker (travel agent) as I think some hear it the same way as they hear “vacuum salesman.” I wondered, when I started with Any Adventure, why the owners chose “Adventure Specialist” for our business cards but it didn’t take long to find that answer. We truly are in the business of planning adventures, concierge style, as experts in any kind of travel our clients can imagine. I had no idea how much studying would be involved or how many certifications would be required or that, in order to grow my clients’ adventures, I’d have to grow my own bottomless suitcase of knowledge. I absolutely love it. Incoming goals as an Adventure Specialist include:
- Leading a Facebook Cruise Group: Most cruise itineraries can be found as Facebook groups, and I encourage my clients to join those groups immediately after booking a trip. It is a great way to discover new friends well before boarding a ship and to learn about onboard activities. We are booked for a Holland America Alaskan Land/Sea trip in August and I opted to lead the Facebook group for the sailing. So far, so good.
- Lead a Travel Group: I’d also like to lead an actual travel group, whether on an ocean cruise or land cruise (did you even know that’s what land tours are called?). This means that I join clients traveling in a pack so that they have an expert present during their adventure.
Writing: Evidently writing a book really is like getting a tattoo. It sucks while in progress but when it finally hits shelves, all the blood, sweat, and tears is quickly forgotten. In 2025, I will publish my second book, (S)Parent—hopefully in both paper and audio formats. Because I am a glutton for punishment, I opted to do all the heavy lifting myself using the many things learned when publishing my first book. Sure, why not just do the editing, proofreading, graphics, etc. etc. etc, myself? I am no longer in control of my mental cookies. If that wasn’t already clear, just know that I’m already mapping out the next books.
Portuguese: After 1400 and something days in a row of Spanish lessons (Thank you, Duolingo), I moved on…to Portuguese. We found an amazing friendship on our 2024 cruise to Hawaii who are from Brazil. Portuguese seems the perfect compliment to their fluent English. We hope to visit them in Brazil in 2026 (and will see them here, in Orlando, this year!).
Celebrate a Decade: The first ten years of marriage moved at a snail’s pace and as if that snail was crawling across hot coals filled with thumb tacks. The first ten years also moved at rapid speed. I cannot believe we will be celebrating ten years in May of 2025. We feel as though we crammed thirty-years of marriage into that first decade and so, yes, we will celebrate. Rich suggested a vow renewal here in Virginia which I wasn’t at all onboard with until he reminded me that I could dress like a princess again. When we got married in 2015, it was a Raleigh wedding filled mostly with my North Carolina friends. Since then, I’ve made wonderful friends here in Virginia and this fiesta will be filled mostly with them.
Love the People Who Love Me: Which brings me to this. It’s no secret that my family-family enjoys dropping members like a hot potato, no matter the size of the infraction or length of the apology. I will never understand that. I have often been encouraged to embrace friends as if they are family–the family you choose. I have had a tough time with that as I continued to chase down relationships with people who I thought should want a relationship with me because, well, isn’t that how most families function? A very wise friend (Thank you, Good Karen) offered me a wake-up call a few weeks ago. I won’t repeat her exact words here but let’s just say, they hit exactly where needed and at the perfect time. In 2025, I hope to stop chasing relationships with those who aren’t interest and embrace the relationships offered by those who love me. Sorry if you find me a bit over-the-top. It’s just how I am.

FInal thoughts? Sure, thanks for asking.

I read this great article from the Wall Street Journal | Apple News by Ben Cohen, and I encourage you to read it as well. It’s Called a Premortem talks about Ron Shaich’s annual birthday ritual of reflection and recharge, during which he asks himself what he can do in the coming years that will age well from his deathbed. Shaich is 71, so while his deathbed may appear “sooner” than many of ours, the reality is that each of our deathbeds may appear at any given moment.

It is quite common to spend the end of December and the beginning of January pontificating about our resolutions (most of which will be broken within two weeks, according to endless studies). Instead, what if we held those thoughts for the days surrounding our birthdays? What if we used our birthdays as a moment to really, really dig into what would make us proud when that date after the dash is written into our obituaries?

Check back in March for my first Premortem!